thank you for loving me
Today marks my 3yrs with God. How time flies. It was not so long ago when I had my first bible talk, when I started visiting the church, when I started studying the bible. It was not part of my plan but it was my heart’s desire. It was in 2004 that I would say, I formally search for God. I had a longing deep within me to get to know Him more. Although I felt even from before that He loves me and is always there for me but it was a one sided relationship. I get all the taking and He makes all the giving. There is no effort on my part to please Him. He was never a part of my day to day activities although I have my morning and evening prayer, and I always call on to Him especially when am out of work and my son is sick. It is during those times that I come begging for His mercy and His grace. Looking back I can’t help but cry. How selfish I was. How I always take Him for granted. How much I caused Him pain. I don’t deserve all the blessings that I have now. I don’t deserve the love that I receive from Him. But here He is still – loving me unconditionally even in my most unloving state.
God you had given me more than enough. You had taught me how to appreciate life. You had taught me how to appreciate even the simplest of things. Untiringly, you always remind me that life is beautiful, I only need to trust you more.
I can’t imagine life without you. You are the only one who understands me. Who loves me so so dearly and am sad that at times I can’t even give back the love that you truly deserves.
I miss you God. You know how much I treasure my moments with you. How much I love talking to you.
I really don’t know what lies ahead. But one thing I hope for is for me to be faithful till the end. I pray that no matter how tempting the offers of the world may be, I will still be firm in saying NO. I pray that I will not get bored in my relationship with you, that I will be excited knowing that one day you long to see me too. I may not be your perfect daughter but you know how much I love you. I may seldom share about you but you know deep within me how much I wanted to. You know my heart’s desire. You know how I want to go on a mission and not think of anything else but you. But I don’t think am capable. I don’t think am equip. If the gauge of having great relationship with you is through a buffer of memory verses, I will fail. Funny God but I only have in mind a lil few.Nakakahiya.
As I start my new year with you, I believe there are a lot of challenges out there waiting for me. Youdon’t want these things to happen but you allow these things to happen for me to grow.Because if not, I will be back in my old self again where nothing else matters but working real hard just for a living.
I will always be encouraged by what Paul tells us about God “is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine” (Ephesians 3:20). This power of God’s is not merely an abstract capability He reserves for creating planets and stars and universes. He is also at work within us who are His children. His power lives inside us, working from the inside out. Our part is to cooperate what He is doing, not to get in His way, to let Him achieve in our lives what He wants to and not to insist on doing things “our” way.
This I should always bear in mind.
Cheers God! Thank you. I am happy to be with you. I am secure because of your love. I hope you had felt that I love you. Because I really do. I just don’t show it at times.
